Welcome to One Thing Better. Each week, the editor in chief of Entrepreneur magazine (that's me) shares one way to achieve a breakthrough at work — and build a career or company you love.
Today's edition is sponsored by Mizzen+Main, one of my favorite clothing brands (who I just modeled for, really!). See details at the end of the newsletter.
You hesitate to ask for what you want.
You know the words you'd say, but you don't say them. Maybe it's a small request. Maybe it's something big and weighty.
There are many reasons for this. Maybe you're unsure how the other person will react. Or you don't want to upset them, or to test the limits, or to challenge the status quo.
Today, I'll inspire you to speak up and get what you want anyway. And it all starts with a relatable moment where my friend stayed silent… and it hurt. Physically.
When politeness becomes pain
My friend Lezlie Karls-Saltarelli is co-founder of the fantastic snack brand Mid-Day Squares.
She recently got a massage, which started great. Super relaxing. Then the massage therapist started working on her scalp, and it hurt. Just way too much pressure.
All Lez needed to do was ask for less pressure. But she didn't. Instead, she laid there silently, unmoving, in agony throughout the whole thing.
I've done this many times. Maybe you have too. It's worth wondering: Why?
Lez has her own explanation: "As a startup founder, I'm having hard conversations all day," she told me. "I just didn't want to have one while trying to relax."
Other people might have other explanations: They might be uncomfortable asking for what they want. Or they feel weird demanding a different kind of touch. Or they don't want to insult a person who's trying to make them feel good. But in some way or another, everyone is a little like Lez: Speaking up feels like a "hard conversation."
As I talked to Lez, though, I wondered something I'd never considered before:
What is this situation like from a massage therapist's point of view?
So I decided to ask.
What the professional thinks
There's an amazing spa in Manhattan and Philly called Rescue Spa. My wife went and loved it.
Venus Jones is a massage therapist there, so I asked her some questions. What does Venus think when a client asks to change the pressure? And what does she think when a client stays silent?
Her answer was eye opening. Here it is, in full:
"I generally welcome clients' feedback about pressure. Everyone's body is different, and I see pressure as something we collaborate on. If someone asks me to go deeper or lighter, I take that as helpful information, not criticism. Clear communication helps me meet the body where it is that day. What's more concerning to me is the absence of feedback, because silence doesn't always mean comfort."
This was extremely insightful — not just about massages, but about everything.
Because here's what Venus is saying:
- Feedback is "collaboration"
- No feedback is concerning
Let's break this down…
The collaboration we're missing
I love that word she used — collaboration.
When we get a massage, we may think of it as something being done to us — but that's not how the person doing the massage thinks. They think of it as a joint action. They are working with you toward a mutual goal.
And this leads to Venus's second point.
We often think that if we stay quiet, we eliminate the risk of embarrassment or criticism. But actually, the reverse is true: When we give no feedback, we create the discomfort — because we introduce uncertainty. The massage therapist never knows if they're doing a good job.
(Could the therapist ask about the pressure? Of course. Most do. But they don't want to constantly ask and ruin your experience. Lez's therapist asked in the very beginning, before the scalp, but then not again.)
Your massage therapist is just like you: They wonder and worry if they're doing a good job. They want to feel the reward of competency. That's human nature! And if you stay silent, you're robbing them of that.
As it turns out, the "hard conversation" makes things easier on everyone.
This applies everywhere
Take this and scale it outward.
Are you in a relationship and not saying what you want? Well, a good relationship is a collaboration. If you're silent, your partner can probably sense that you're holding something back — which makes them uncomfortable.
At work, do you want to move up? Want more responsibility? Well, your colleagues want to collaborate with you. And they're looking for signs that you do too.
If you're not saying something, they might assume you do not want to collaborate. Maybe they start trusting you less, assuming you're not invested in the partnership, or wonder if you're looking for an out. Maybe they don't see you as someone to grow with.
The costs of silence
When we keep things to ourselves, we don't eliminate discomfort. We actually create it — for ourselves and for others.
Will this be true in every single case? Of course not. Some bosses do not think collaboratively. Some romantic partners don't either. But honestly, I don't want to be around those people anyway.
So, how do you find out which people are worth collaborating with?
There's only one way: You speak up and see how they respond.
In this way, "asking for what you want" is not selfish at all. It's responsible. You are setting expectations, making lines clear, and inviting people into your shared goals.
So just say it.
That's how to do one thing better.
I just did some fashion modeling...
I never expected to be a fashion model. Then one of my favorite brands called me.
Truth be told, I'm a casual dresser. I used to do keynote talks in jeans and a t-shirt. But over time, I realized something:
If I want people to take me seriously, then I need to show that I take them seriously.
So I started dressing up more — and came to love Mizzen+Main, whose clothing is sharp, comfortable, and versatile.
A few months ago, the brand reached out and asked: Would I like to do a photo shoot, and be part of their next campaign? My wife and I thought this was hilarious. But also: YES! Of course, yes!
Check out the video they made.
You can find great clothes (and more of my face!) at their website.
It's a nice reminder: When you show up with intention, people take notice.
Final notes for today...
P.S. What marketing looks like in 2026: I had a great conversation about this with Gary Vaynerchuk. Listen!
P.P.S. Send this newsletter to someone who needs it! Forward to them, or just send this link to today's edition.
P.P.P.S. Want my help in a 1:1 call? I'm on Intro, where people book my time for quick consulting calls. Let's talk!
P.P.P.P.S. Thank you to Nikita Upadhyay for connecting me with Venus Jones of Rescue Spa!
That's all for this week! See you next Tuesday.
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