Our kids never stop learning life skills. Neither do we.For those of us who worry we didn’t teach enough while our kids were younger
From 2016-2021, Christine Koh and I co-hosted the Edit Your Life podcast so we could expand upon the ideas in our book, MINIMALIST PARENTING. The through line: small steps lead to big changes. One of our favorite topics was the importance of teaching kids life skills (or move-out skills, as I liked to call them). Our kids were pre-teens and teens at the time and we believed chores, allowance, and accountability would help them grow into functional, independent adults. (Or so we hoped. There are no absolutes in parenting. Kids aren’t machines, and input doesn’t guarantee output.) Spurred on by one of these conversations, we brainstormed a list of 100 life skills kids could learn in five minutes or less. Christine turned the list into a sharable graphic and it went viral, spawning conversations all over social media. I was reminded of this when Christine re-shared the now seven year-old list in her recent newsletter which I encourage you to read as it’s full of gems like this👇:
 Reading through the life skills list again rocketed me back to our conversations when my kids’ “functional adulthood” was theoretical. Now they’re actual adults. How did it all work out? I’m glad to report my kids are indeed functional adults, and like so much else, my parenting choices have only so much to do with it. Now that I’m further down the parenting road with a wider lens and a longer arc, I’m relieved to discover my active teaching of life skills wasn’t always necessary. Sometimes it even got in the way. When my kids were younger, chores were a struggle and their uptake of life skills was uneven. They picked up some practical tasks easily enough, but others took a frustratingly long time to learn. Several fell off the list altogether. With the benefit of hindsight, I see some life skills, like other childhood “learnings,” were on their own inscrutable timeline. This is obvious to me but only in retrospect, sort of like looking back on potty training and knowing now that when it happened mattered less than if it happened. Here’s how I put it on Notes:
I’m committed as ever to the importance of teaching young kids life skills and I’m proud Christine and I amplified that message and helped parents put it into practice. I’m also grateful to witness how life never stops handing us new tasks and we never stop learning how to handle them (or deftly palm them off on someone else). 😉 We’re all getting older and wiser. It’s an encouraging thought.
📝 NOTES OF NOTE
🗄️ IN THE ARCHIVES
…and more on parenting adult kids Thanks for reading Parent of Adults, my invitation to compare notes on life beyond the empty nest. I’m Asha Dornfest, a Portland, Oregon-based author & parent of two young adults. ➡️ Learn more about Parent of Adults or subscribe now for free.
|
Tuesday, July 1, 2025
Our kids never stop learning life skills. Neither do we.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
S&P 500 dips as traders ditch high-flying stocks and go bargain hunting
The start of the third quarter was marked by a a vibe shift: an intense rotation from the market's winners into value stocks. Your Eveni...
-
A cautionary note on a very funny meme ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ͏ ...
-
Splurges for the C-suite … Die Hard holiday marketing … Pizza Hut's Book It! Turns 40 If you've applied to jobs throughout 2024 wit...
-
Women's health has been ignored for most of history. This venture capitalist says that's changing. View this email in your browse...
No comments:
Post a Comment